Prof: OK, I know Joe Kelly shouldn’t have thrown at Alex Bregman, especially since he literally smashed his own window during the off-season due to having garbage location. But an eight game suspension? Eight? And partially because he had the cheek to basically nana-nana-boo-boo Carlos Correa? Man, that’s weak. There was a Twitter account called Joe Kelly Fight Club back in the day and I think that’s appropriate because all that nerd wants to do is throw down. Hell yeah.
Bear with me, guys; I have a new job and I have new hours, and I’m still trying to get used to it. There’s some other stuff happening in my life, too, but we can talk about that later. Just know good things are happening for your favorite Prof.
Scouts: Ok, wordpress just reverted the past two hours of my work, so as you can Imagine I’m not very happy right now and today’s post is going to be extra light on content. Let me just say the new block editor effing sucks.
Today’s music is my current obsession. I’m pretty sure I’ve listened to the entire album on repeat for a month or two strait. Hope you enjoy!
Cubs 7, Reds 12 – Prof: High flying, adored. No, it’s not Evita, it’s the baseball. Is it juiced this year? Some pitchers seem to think so. This game doesn’t help quell the rumors. Kyle Hendricks went from a complete game to a big, fat L, and Sonny Gray K’d 11 Cubbies. On the Reds side, we had Moose, Senzel, and Castellanos out here mashing. Castellanos had a grand slam! What a slugfest.
Dodgers 4, Asterisks 2 F/13 – Scouts: MLB’s official recap beings with the following sentence: “As Joe Kelly showed, you didn’t have to have been on the 2017 Dodgers to appreciate the satisfaction of beating the Houston Astros.” That should tell you just how hated the Houston Cheaters are right now. Edwin Rios hit MLB’s first lead-off two run homer courtesy of the new bonus runner in extra innings rule.
White Sox 4, Spiders 0 – Scouts: Lucas Giolito through 6 shutout innings and got the win despite Zach Plesac throwing 8 shutout innings. That Spider bullpen owes Zach a few beers after their 9th inning meltdown.
Royals 4, Tigers 5 – Prof: Yes, there are people you’ve heard of on the Kansas City team, but it’s still really only Whit Merrifeld worth writing home about. On Detroit’s side, we have JaCoby Jones and Jonathan Schoop hitting bombs.
Brewers 3, Pirates 0 – Prof: Milwaukee’s New uniforms are fire. I love how classy they look. It’s great. Know what else is great? Brandon Woodruff was last night. The Brew Crew pitcher went into the seventh, struck out 10 and only allowed one hit. Ben Gamel hit a homer.
Rays 4, Braves 7 – Scouts: Freddie Freeman followed up a 4 strikeout day with a 4 hit 3 RBI day.
Red Sox 6, Mets 5 – Scouts: The Sox snapped a 4 game losing streak by barely sneaking by the lolMets. They had to outlast Jacob deGrom to do it.
Yankees 9, Orioles 3 – Scouts: The Yankees do what they do, hit homers, and the O’s do what they do. Give them up. All in a game that wasn’t supposed to be played as both teams have postponements on the books thanks to the Marlins. 2020 is weird.
Cardinals 0, Twins 3 – Scouts: Today I learned that Rich Hill didn’t actually retire 17 years ago like my mind lead me to believe. Hill threw 5 shutout innings to earn the win.
Padres 6, Giants 7 – Scouts: Mike Yastrzemski hit a pair of homers, including the walk-off in the 9th.
Rockies 5, A’s 1 – Scouts: Not really much to write about in this one. Germain Marquez struck out 8 in 6 and gave up just one run, so that’s cool I guess.
Dbacks 4, Rangers 7 – Prof: Joey Gallo came to smash dingers and that’s what he did. Y’all, I forgot that Todd Fraizer went to Texas. MadBum had a not so great outing for the Gritty Snakes. 2020 continues to be savage.
Nationals 4, Blue Jays 0 F/10 – Scouts: Despite being the visiting team in their own stadium and down to their final out, the Nats got a deflected ball off the pitcher and a triple to bust out at literally the last second.
Mariners 10, Angels 7 – Scouts: Lot of offense in this one. Kyle Seager, Dylan Moore, Shohei Ohtani, and Brian Goodwin all had 3 RBI’s each. The Mariners scored 9 of their 10 runs in the 6-8th innings. The Angels bullpen picked up two blown saves. Oof.