Scouts: Sorry folks, I don’t really have much for you today, let’s just dive right into the games shall we?
Cardinals 12, Brewers 2 – Prof: First of all, I did not know that Cory Spangenberg played in Milwaukee now. Secondly, not enough happened for me to be able to create an acrostic of DEVIL MAGIC in today’s post but know that Paul DeJong was all over the place, and Yadi Molina was his pesky, clutch self as usual. DeJong had a two run homer, Yadi went solo. Adam Wainwright started but only lasted about 3 2/3 innings. Last time I saw Waino was actually at Miller Park, when he was injured in a freak incident. I was kinda sad about it. As you know, I have a love and appreciation for Waino despite his Redbird associations.
Pirates 5, Phillies 6 F/11 – Prof: Bryce Harper is back from paternity leave. BHarp and his wife are the proud parents of a little boy named Krew Aron Harper. Bryce was also the proud parent of an eighth inning home run which helped the Phillies climb back into this game. The Pennsylvania gruesome twosome went into extra innings, finishing up with a walk-off dinger from Sean Rodriguez.
Reds 6, Marlins 3 – Prof: Cincinnati hit three home runs, Miami hit two, and Sonny Gray went six innings with six strikeouts during the Reds’ field trip to Macondo Banana Massacre Field.
Athletics 19, Royals 4 – Scouts: No KC pitcher lasted longer than 1.2 innings. No KC pitcher was able to avoid getting tagged for at least one run. Marcus Semien had 7, yes 7 RBI’s (Triple and a Homer). No Oakland starter went hit-less. Oakland mixed up the runs with doubles, triples, and 4 homers. Just a ugly game all around for the Royals.
Braves 1, Rockies 3 – Prof: This was a slow going game until the bottom of the eighth, when the Rockies finally got on the board with a Charlie Blackmon sac fly. The Braves answered back with their own sac fly RBI to tie it up. However, in the bottom of the ninth, Ryan McMahon hit a two run walk-off homer to secure victory for Colorado. Fun fact – I know someone who went to the game and he said that Coors Field is tall person friendly and that Dinger is much cooler in person. I’ll take his word for it.
Diamondbacks 6, Giants 4 – Scouts: There was nothing particularly special or interesting about this game so far as I can tell. I mean pitching was average, no one really had any particularly stand out performance despite 10 runs beign scored. It was just sort of your perfectly average, all around game.
Yankees 5, Mariners 4 – Scouts: The Yankees return to the win column thanks to Mike Ford’s two homers. Gleyber Torres also went deep for the Evil Empire.
Dodgers 3, Padres 4 – Scouts: The Dodgers lose a rare game to the Padres. Dustin May didn’t have a particularly great performance allowing 4 runs in 5.1 innings for LA, but then again neither did Eric Lauer ( 3 runs over 6 innings) for the Padres. The difference in this one was Matt Strahm who provided two innings of shut down pitching and Kirby Yates who struck out the side in the 9th.
Fan Interference 
The Cardinals have a long history of playing halfassed baseball through the break, then rising out of their graves like the revenants in Disney’s Night on Bald Mountain to steamroll to the head of the pack by September.
I’m still kinda surprised at the way Milwaukee folded, though.
But I’m not surprised that the Feesh flopped again last night. They’re tanking like the bubblers from fire hose runoff at Chernobyl (Help! That series has taken over my mind!).
Back to Book II of Don Quixote. I’m up to the Dolorous Duenna. Dear Buddha, I love this book. Since it takes an entire baseball season to read at a leisurely pace, it’s the ideal distraction for a summer otherwise soggy with ennui.
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