Illham Omar, queen of the “Squad”, who came from a “shit hole country” and who must represent a district that’s got a crack house on every block and where you can get shot anytime just walking down the street because people with brown skin are everywhere and they all talk so funny you can hardly understand them, happens to be my representative in the congress of the United States of America. In fact I voted for her because I had no moral alternative. I thought you might be interested in a tour of this crime infested place where hardly anybody (excluding me when I’ve been drinking) likes watching 1950’s Audie Murphy westerns and that’s why it’s so hard to make America great again.
Raphie and I take a walking / wagon ride tour of Illhan’s district most every morning and so far we ain’t been shot at or come across an unconscious drug addict laying on the sidewalk. As we go by the houses of the people who anonymously help out the old white guy in the middle of the block with snow shoveling during the worst of the winter I wonder if the house on the north corner with a sign in the yard with the picture of a red heart, that Raphie and his buddy Ivan regarded as a kind of navigational landmark, is the residence of one our block’s two snow blower angels I told you guys about some months ago. At the end of the next block there are two houses, both on the corner and across the street from each other, which look to be in competition with each other to have the most beautiful landscaping – rocks – flowers – shrubbery – rustic wheel barrels full of flowers – butterflies flying in and out – and in one of them a guy most always out in his yard who loves to talk to the kids wowed by his lawn. That street is the bike and pedestrian friendly entry way to the local park and we often exchange hellos with kids Raphie’s age and babies in strollers. So far at least ain’t none of them offered to sell us some smack or been carrying a gun far as I could tell. On the west side of our block there’s a house with what Raph calls the “pretty rocks”. At the top of the yard there’s a sign which says “SMPLSLOVE” and on the top of the yards retaining wall there’s a bunch of hand painted rocks, gnomes, a little post office, school bus and the word love painted everywhere. Directly across the street is the church which unhesitatingly offered themselves to our family daycare as a 24 hour emergency shelter. And it sure is a nice place to be, with someone you love, when the sun gets behind a cloud and the breeze blows up.
Yeah, Illham Omar you go back to where you came from, TWINS TERRITORY!!!
Friday – Rockies 12 Reds 2 | Saturday – Reds 3 Rockies 1
The Reds learned that if you hold a team to one run you’ll probably win and if you hold them to twelve runs you’ll probably lose.
Friday – Dodgers 4 Nationals 2 | Saturday – Dodgers 9 Nationals 3
The Nationals learned that the Dodgers should be illegal.
Friday – Braves 9 Phillies 2 | Saturday – Braves 15 Phillies 7
The Braves push their lead to 7 1/2 over the Phillies and 6 1/2 over the Nationals. That’s cool but I hope the Nats win the wild card.
Friday – Rays 3 Blue Jays 1 | Saturday – Blue jays 10 Rays 9
Crap! the Red Sox have slipped past the Rays for second place.
Friday – Red Sox 10 Yankees 5 | Saturday – Red Sox 9 Yankees 5
On the bright side the Yankees have been giving up an awful lot of runs lately and Sabbathia just went on the injured list
Friday – Mets 6 Pirates 3 | Saturday – Pirates 5 Mets 4 | Mets 3 Pirates 0
That first Saturday score must be wrong because the standings say the Mets have won three straight. Oh well.
Friday – Twins 6 White Sox 2 | Saturday – White Sox 5 Twins 1
Hey who took the second 1 out of the Twins lead
Look at those fucking faces. America has always wanted to be great.
Friday – Marlins 3 Diamondbacks 2 | Saturday – Diamondbacks 9 Marlins 2
The Marlins must of lost on Saturday because they no longer have Sergio Roma.
Friday – Brewers 3 Cubs 2 | Saturday – Brewers 5 Cubs 3 (F/10)
The Brewers, Cubs and Cardinals are all within a game of each other in the NL 500 club.
Indians 8 Royals 3 | Saturday – Indians 9 Royals 1
Clevelanders you’ve had your fun with the Tigers and Royals but Tuesday you’ll be seeing Verlander and the Astros. Back to your cage!
Friday – Cardinals 5 Astros 3 | Saturday – Astros 8 Cardinals 2
The Cardinals had a good week and the Astros have a good team
Friday – Orioles 9 Angels 3 | Saturday – Orioles 8 Angels 7
Nothing against the Angels but it’s nice to see the Orioles win once in a while
Friday – Rangers 5 Athletics 2 | Saturday – Athletics 5 Rangers 4
The Athletics are only half a game off the wild card
Friday – Giants 2 Padres 1 (F/11) | Saturday – Padres 5 Giants 1
The Giants are tied for second in the NL West, when did that happen?
Friday – Mariners 3 Tigers 2 | Saturday – Mariners 8 Tigers 1
If I was a Tiger’s fan I’d become a Twins fan.