Prof: Today’s music is a throwback to my high school days and one of my favorite bands, the Gin Blossoms. High School Prof was very into this band when my classmates were all listening to Primus and Cypress Hill. I still haven’t been to a concert. I don’t get out much.
Scouts: Sorry for the highlight overload today, but there were 5 Grand Slams and like 12 walk off homers, so instead of picking and choosing, I went with EVERYONE!
Cardinals 5, Cubs 13 – Scouts: The Cubs are back on top, and in the span of 30 days have gone from dead last to first place in the division. It took the bats a few innings to warm up, but when they did, they melted. 6 runs in the 8th inning alone turned a run-away win into a massive blowout.
Royals 2, Tigers 5 F/10 – Prof: Brandon Dixon was a pinch hitter and left fielder in this contest, which went extra innings. Why do I mention him, when he’s not one of the big names on the Detroit squad? Well, it’s because Mr. Dixon hit a three run homer in the tenth inning to lift El Tigres to victory.
Mariners 10, Spiders 0 – Prof: The first of many ten spots in today’s recap, and this one was the butt-kickingest. The Mariners had been in a bit of a slump, but they demolished it with this absolute drubbing of Cleveland. It started with a Jay Bruce grand slam in the first inning, and then there were two other homers to boot. Two RBI singles added to the hurt for the Tragical Land of Cleve. It got so bad they had to use the services of Kevin Plawecki for an inning – Kevin Plawecki, who usually catches the pitches.
Braves 3, Marlins 1 F/10 – Prof: Old Fashioned Trickery and a flying pinch hitting pitcher proved to be the spark that Atlanta needed to complete the sweep of the floundering Feesh. What’s that old fashioned trickery, you say? Well, the light bat of Ender Inciarte was involved. Ender faked a bunt and instead hit a good oppo double, which caused young master Max Fried to score from first! The youngster slid into home, causing half of Braves Twitter to have a heart attack, and the other half (yours truly included) to cheer ridiculously. Pitchers are athletes, too.
Athletics 3, Pirates 5 F/13 – Scouts: 6 of the game’s 8 runs were scored in the 13th. I guess everyone really wanted to go home. Despite taking a 2 run lead in the top of the frame, the Pirates didn’t give up. First Adam Frazier singled in Cole Tucker, and then Starling Marte homered in Frazier and Jung Ho Kang to walk it off for the Bucks.
Nationals 1, Phillies 7 – Scouts: 5 runs in the 6th turned a 1 run lead into a blowout as the Nationals bullpen strikes again.
Red Sox 9, White Sox 2 – Prof: The Battle of the Laundry continued. It was knotted up until the eighth inning, when the Boston bats got hot. Mitch Moreland broke the tie, but then a few batters later Xander Bogaerts hit a grand slam. That’s it. That’s the ballgame.
Mets 2, Brewers 3 – Scouts: Stop me if you’ve heard this one before. Christian Yelich steps up to the plate, the ball goes boom, Brewers win.
Blue Jays 2, Rangers 10 – Prof: The Rangers were feeling froggy. A three run homer in the third inning quickly raised Texas to six runs. Singles and bloops added to the score.
Diamondbacks 7, Rockies 8 – Prof: Colorado came from behind with a bases loaded triple in the eighth inning, culminating in five runs total, and the Rox squeaked by the division rival Gritty Snakes.
Astros 10, Angels 4 – Scouts: Matt Harvey was smacked around once again giving up 5 runs in 4.2 innings including a two run shot by Carlos Correa and a Grand Slam off the bat of Alex Bregman.
Twins 1, Yankees 4 F/8 – Prof: In this rain-soaked, called game, the Yankees came out on top. Two of New York’s runs were brought to you by errors in the second inning.
Dodgers 5, Padres 8 – Scouts: Every little kid playing whiffleball in the back yard has the same fantasy. Bottom of the 9th, a few runs behind, here comes the pitch, he hits it, way back! Oh that might have the distance! And the crowd goes wild! Hunter Renfroe wins the game on a walk off Grand Slam!
Giants 6, Reds 5 – Scouts: What a day for 9th inning heroics! Brandon Crawford was called upon to enter the game in the top of the 9th with Buster Posey standing on second as the winning run. A single might have done the trick here, but Crawford went for broke and homered. Turns out, Crawford’s insurance run was the difference here as Kyle Farmer solo’d in the botton of the 9th for the Reds.
Rays, Orioles – PPD
Fan Interference 
Nats went 1-2 in Philly this weekend, and to paraphrase Larry Hockett, it’s a miracle that they won one.
Consider:
.
To add insult to injury, this happened:
I read something about their returning to their Philly hotel at 4AM, with plans to leave again at 7AM. I believe the term for tonight’s game against the Brew Crew in Milwaukee is “scheduled loss”.
sigh
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My dog, that’s an absolute travel failure. How do such things get to that point?
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No idea.
I googled it this morning, and I’m told that it’s less than 14 hours by ground transportation from CBP in Philly to Miller Park in Milwaukee.
Not sure a couple of buses would’ve been any better, but it couldn’t have been any worse.
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Common sense says that if you don’t have a solution by 11pm or midnight, send them to a hotel. How were angry agents not all over their asses?
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The Twins didn’t win yesterday. There is therefore nothing of note to say. Please excuse my absence.
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Prof, peetchers are not “athletes.” They are fragile, delicate wittoo creatures who need to be pwotected from the vichysisitudes of batting by designated gimpy former outfielders and first basemen from running the bases so they won’t hurt their arms or their tushies.
And as the Feesh head into the cannery of Wrigley Field tonight they find themselves a full fifteen games shy of the strange attractor, which is available for lease to teams closer to mediocrity than excrement. Just drop me a line if you’re interessed and we’ll draw up a short term lease.
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The entire city of Cleveland begs for 82- 80 and the illusionary comfort of not being 80 – 82. Praise be to the Damn Dirty Gods.
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