This has not been a stellar season for the Mutts so far, has it? They’re playing like they’ve got a load in their pants. Their once star pitcher has imploded and been sent packing to the Little Red Chew Toy where the roar of the greasepaint will be pretty hard to hear. And today, they suffered a cerebroflatular episode of Rabelaisian proportions that cost them a game with, of all people, said Little Red Chew Toy.
The Mutts fouled their caps in the very first inning, when Wilmer Flores went up to bat second though he was supposed to bat third according to the lineup card submitted to the statisticians and posted on the dugout bulletin board. Unfortunately rookie manager Mickey Calloway, who is having a season of captaincy like Lewis Brinson’s season of plateflailing, filled out a lineup card showing Asdrubal Cabrera batting second. The Reds picked up on the discrepancy right away but said nothing until Cabrera doubled, when Chew Toy manager Jim Riggleman notified the umpires, the double was nullified and the inning ended. Riggleman later said he felt bad about it.
Sure he did. Guffaw.
With the game tied 1-1 in the bottom of the 10th Adam Duvall popped a solo homer orf old friend A. J. Ramos late of the Feesh. Point, set and match to the Little Red Chew Toy. They won their first season series since the glaciers receded and hominids filtered south hungry for mastodon and giant sloth.
The former Dark Night who said “Ni!” yesterday found himself hustled across the infield to the opposing dugout while second string catcher Devin Mesoraco was carted back in the other direction. Mesoraco started today’s game for the Mutts and went 0-4.
Well, if you wanna get something, you gotta give something, right? We used to call it “potlatch.”