Scouts: So early reviews are out on the new Avengers movie and everyone seems to feel it lives up to the hype. I’ve been actively avoiding all spoilers, and my general policy is to watch the first reveal trailer, then no more, so I’m excited to finally get to go see this movie. I can’t go see the midnight Thursday openings anymore because I’m too damn old to stay up so far past my bedtime, so I’ll try to book a ticket at the local reserve your own seat in a comfortable as hell recliner movie theater over the weekend. Who else is planning on seeing the movie in the opening week? What are your expectations? Are you going because you are that excited or you want to go early to avoid any potential spoilers from being ruined?
Twins 3, Yankees 8 – Prof: It’s just not the Twins’ series. The Yankees started out slowly but then poured it on in the seventh inning with home runs by Aaron Judge and Gary Sanchez (plus an RBI to boot). Didi Gregorius hit a two run homer in the fifth.
Braves 7, Reds 9 F/12 – Prof: Peak Barving. The Braves are at it again, losing to a team that no one else loses to. At least we’re on brand still. It started out pretty crappy for Atlanta, Joey Votto and my boy Scooter Gennett both hit homers in the fifth inning. Tyler Mahle had a no-hitter going until the seventh inning thanks to the holy bat of Freddie Freeman, who hit a dinger to make up for an error in the second inning that allowed Gennett to score. My boy Scoots Magoots was pretty busy last night… but more on that in a second. After FF5 dropped that bomb, it was all Atlanta all the time, getting two more runs in the seventh and four in the ninth (including another FreeBomb) to tie it up. Anyway, onto the twelfth inning. Guess who hit the winning home run? That’s right, friends, Ryan “Scooter” Gennett himself, bringing Joey Votto along with him. And that’s how the Braves lost once again to one of the worst teams in the league.
Brewers 5, Royals 2 – Scouts: Travis Shaw smacked a three-run bomb in the third and Lorenzo Cain jacked a solo in the 7th. Kansas City is now 1-8 at home.
Padres 0, Rockies 8 – Scouts: Kyle Freeland picked up his first win in 16 appearances, (12 starts), and to do so he had to three hit the Padres over 7 innings. That’s a pretty long time to wait for a victory there. Trevor Story helped out with a two-out grand slam in the second.
Diamondbacks 8, Phillies 4 – Prof: Pretty good night for former Tiger Alex Avila, who went 3-4 with a homer in this Gritty Snake victory. A.J. Pollock went 2-4 as well. Not so great a night for starter Robbie Ray who left after giving up three runs in the third inning and being yanked in the fourth. Luckily, their bullpen saved the day.
Red Sox 3, Blue Jays 4 F/10 – Prof: These two teams have been mad successful lately, with the Red Sox knocking on the door of twenty games won already in this young season, but Toronto wasn’t having it. The Grandy Man hit a walk-off homer off the usually razor sharp Craig Kimbrel (forever my dude) in the tenth to seal the deal.
Athletics 3, Rangers 2 – Prof: I really need to learn who Oakland’s Mark Canha is. He’s been in the league for three years now, but is 29 years old. Looks like he was a journeyman for a while and is now making the best of his situation. Good for you, dude. Anyway, Canha went 1-4 but that one was a solo blast to right, so there’s that. Cole Hamels is not pitching well, guys. He can’t pitch his way out of a wet paper bag. He must’ve gotten REALLY old, really quickly. Kinda makes me sad. I hate when old pitchers have to be sold for glue.
Angels 8, Astros 7 – Scouts: In case you forgot, there are other players on the team not named Shohei Ohtani. I never thought I’d see the day where Mike Trout wasn’t the biggest name on his own team, but here we are. Ohtani had an off-day lasting just 5.1 and giving up 4 runs, but the Angels won anyways. Andrelton Simmons homered twice and Mike Trout hit his MLB leading 10th home run.
Mets 6, Cardinals 5 F/10 – Scouts: Yoenis Cespedes fucking destroyed a ball hitting it 463 feet and tying the game. Jay Bruce hit a game-winning solo shot in the 10th and the Mets stand 1.5 games ahead of the freaking Phillies int he NL East. Can anyone explain to me just what the hell is going on?
Mariners 1, White Sox 0 – Prof: Oof. This is puritan baseball. Each team had five hits a piece, but only one run to show for it – a single RBI in the fourth inning to bring home the Seager Brother. Two errors for Seattle and one for Chicago added to the…. excitement? Yeah, let’s go with that.
Cubs 10, Spiders 3 – Prof: Baby Babe Ruth lost a whole toddler’s worth of weight during the offseason and I can barely recognize him, but his swing is still lethal. The Schwarbs smacked one in the second inning, and again in the fourth, solo dingers both. Not to be outdone by his teammates, Willson Contreras and Ian Happ both hit home runs, too.
Marlins 3, Dodgers 2 – Scouts: Holy Shit the Marlins won a game, and beat the Dodgers at that! The BVI Marlins actually scored one in the 8th and one in the 9th to come from behind and take one from the Dodgers who are now sitting at .500 at the end of April.
Nationals 3, Giants 4 – Scouts: This west coast trip is quickly turning disastrous for the Nats who lost again, to a team they really should be beating. The Nats are now 4 games below .500 as Mac Williamson smacked a go-ahead homer and survived an incredibly scary pay in the field as he tripped over the bullpen mound and went head first into a wall. Look, I get the on the field bullpen has been a thing for forever, but why? We have the technology to avoid such nonsense, and just because we always did it, is no reason to continue with a dangerous tradition. Move the damn bullpens off the field of play already. It’s 2018 for fucks sake.
Rays vs Orioles, Tigers vs Pirates – PPD – Scouts: Whoop! We didn’t lose! Way to go team!