Hi Folks. It’s just gonna be a “She Said” today as Scout is unavailable. I’m so excited about the games that we were blessed with yesterday; there were some amazing performances and things that made your scratch your head in wonder. These are the games that actually matter.
First of all, let’s get our minds right.
Cubs 8, Marlins 4 – First pitch. Literally the first pitch. Ian Happ proved that last year wasn’t a fluke as he went yard on the very first pitch he saw. And while the Marlins came back and tied it up for a while (thanks Jon Lester), it didn’t take too long for the Cubs to remember that they are champions. Fish, sit down. Be humble.
Cardinals 4, Mets 9 – See, this was supposed to have been a matchup between Adam Wainwright and Noah Syndergaard but Waino got hurt once again and so Carlos Martinez got the start. It really didn’t matter, and I doubt it would’ve mattered if Waino had taken the mound either, because Thor was ridiculous. Syndergaard went six full innings and struck out ten, which puts him in the company of such men as Bob Gibson – Opening Day starters who struck out double digits batters. Most impressive, no? If the Mets can continue to utilize their actually exciting and excellent pitching staff, keep them healthy, and can keep guys like Yoenis Cespedes and Brandon Nimmo hungry the NL East might have another team to look out for.
Indians 1, Mariners 2 – A battle between aces old and new. Corey Kluber pitched 8 innings, gave up two in the first and was saddled with the loss. Bit rough going for a winning robot but I’m sure he’ll have a motherboard upgrade soon.
Rockies 2, Diamondbacks 8 – What up Jake Lamb!?! What up Patrick Corbin!?! The Gritty Snakes are my secret choice for NL West winners this year. One reason is because of these two players. Colorado had the outstanding play of their Big Three (Blackmon, LeMahieu, Arenado) but you can’t counter things like Chris Rusin and his 20.00 ERA.
White Sox 14, Royals 7 – WE WOKE UP IN (Kauffman) SAYING HOW THE HELL DID THIS SHIZ HAPPEN, OH BABY. Why am I quoting Beyonce? Because the White Sox went WILD. It all started with the Royals absolutely destroying Big Lame James – I’m sorry, I really have to stop calling him that. James Shields. James Shields coughed up four runs in the first inning alone and I would have thought that the Sox would’ve run him off the mound with his butt on fire but nope. He pitched five scoreless innings after that as his teammates righted the ship with five runs in the fourth and three in the fifth. Matt Davidson – WHO? – hit three homers. You read that right. Insanity!
Astros 4, Rangers 1 – GEORGE SPRINGER DONE DID IT AGAIN. Last year, he hit a leadoff homer. Young Master Springer did it again this year. Ain’t that something? Justin Verlander went six scoreless innings, and Jake from State Farm Marisnick went yard as well. (If you might remember, I have always thought that Marisnick has been underrated and nearly forgotten, but I like him and think he’s got mad potential.) Looks like the Astros are coming back where they they left off.
Angels 5, Athletics 6 F/11 – the first of our scores that went into extras, this battle of American League Cali teams was an actual surprise to your friendly neighborhood Prof, seeing as how on paper the Angels seem to be a better team. But never count out scrappy dudes from Oakland. Two other insane surprises – Ohtani – a pitcher – was the Angels’ DH and got a hit. And Mike Trout went and got himself a big old goose egg (0-6) to start the season.
Twins 2, Orioles 3 F/11 – If I didn’t have to work today, I could have gone to the game with a fellow I’ve been seeing as he won opening day tickets to OPACY this morning at his office. But alas, I did have to work, and therefore could not see Adam Jones hit the walkoff in the eleventh inning to win Baltimore’s eighth straight Opening Day game. Dylan Bundy pitched well, as did Jake Odorizzi.
Phillies 5, Braves 8 – Unexpected heroes come when you’re down and out. Atlanta was down five runs in the eighth when young Ozzie Albies homered to begin the rally. After that, it was scoring off of errors, singles, and then the weirdest, most Braves move you could imagine. Nick Markakis, certified creaky old man who primarily hits nothing but singles it seems, had been penciled into the cleanup spot. We in BravesFam laughed at the manager’s stupidity, and then despaired, and then began to doubt. But we got loyalty inside our DNA. Not only did Markakis drive in a run, dude hit the biggest homer of the game and brought home not only himself but young Dansby Swanson lookalike Charlie Culberson and Freddie F’n Freeman himself. Kakes with a walkoff.
Yankees 6, Blue Jays 1 – An emotional Opening Day at Rogers Centre as Toronto paid tribute to the late, great Roy Halladay by retiring his jersey before the game began. After a difficult and sad opening, the Yankees got down to business, with Giancarlo Stanton christening his pinstripes with a homer in the first inning. He went on to double and drive home fellow huge mountain of a man Aaron Judge in the fifth and, oh, homered in the ninth inning just to put a feather in his cap. Welcome to New York, Iron Giant.
Red Sox 4, Rays 6 – Denard Span hit a three run triple in the eighth inning. This is what put Tampa Bay over the top. This is illogical, but hey. That’s why we play the game. Two legitimate aces started the game – Chris Sale and Chris Archer – but neither one got the Win or Loss. It was a bullpen friendly outing.
Giants 1, Dodgers 0 – The Giants are a garbage scull whose best player – MadBum – is on the DL. The Dodgers are the absolute cream of the NL West. Clayton Kershaw was their starter. He’s a surefire first ballot Hall of Famer. San Francisco started a dude named Ty Blach that I have literally never heard of before. This game… This game was won by a solo blast by Joe Panik. Nothing from Puig. Nothing from Kemp. Nothing from LA at all. Clayton Kershaw didn’t deserve this mess, nor does he ever. If they never win a World Series I’m going to personally slap every last one of these jokers for doing Kersh this way.
Brewers 2, Padres 1 F/12 – Fun Fact: The Padres and the Brewers were neck and neck in the “Ultimate Opening Day Loser” race, having lost Opening Day starts for the last several seasons. And like any good losers, they didn’t want to relinquish their loserness. But alas, someone’s gotta win, and today that was the retooled Milwaukee Brewers. Chase Anderson pitched well for the Brew Crew, and new addition Christian Yelich drove in the first run in the third inning. The Padres came back in the ninth inning, getting a knock off last year’s closer extraordinaire, Corey “Evil” Knebel, giving him a blown save for the first time in…. god, I don’t even know how long. Good old Jeremy Jeffress, who is back in Milwaukee where he’s beloved and always pitches well, did his thing and came back to get the team on his back and ended up with the W. A single from Orlando Arcia won the whole kit and kaboodle.
Pirates, Tigers – PPD
Nationals, Reds – PPD