He Said, She Said – Recaps for 5/31/17

We had some high scoring games last night! Let’s talk about them. I’m adding links to games I don’t really have the time (or, let’s be honest, the energy) to recap. My sleep schedule is wack. Insomnia is the worst.

Also, do yourself a favor and read up on the Mr. Met scandal from last night. He flipped someone off. But how can you flip someone the bird if you have no middle finger? This is mascot-ist!

Rays 7, Rangers 5 F/10

Braves 1, Angels 2 – Haunted by the ghosts of Braves past. Eric Young Jr. and Bud Norris, by their powers combined, rallied the Angels to a win.

Astros 17, Twins 6 – Well, darn it all. Stex, I’m happy for you. Happy, I feel your pain. But man, did the Astros have themselves a time in the Twin Cities last night. George Springer was a ridiculous beastly man, reaching base in all six of his plate appearances plus hitting a monster home run (and another to spare!). Other home runs included Carlos Correa, Alex Bregman, Marwin Gonzalez, and El Oso Blanco! Holy cow!

Phillies 2, Marlins 10 – Big Justin Bour hit two home runs last night. Why do I think of the old Burger King commercial every time I write that? Big….buckin’….chicken. I know, you guys, I embarrass myself, too. Anyway, even though the Feesh whooped up on Philly no one was there to see it. Apparently the actual head count of folks lining up at Macondo Banana Massacre Field was less than 2,000! What the ever loving hell, man? Did they find out that Jeb! is out and now they won’t get bought out by Jeets and Co?

Cubs 1, Padres 2

Brewers 7, Mets 1 – Hello again, Eric Thames! Ren, help me sing the Eric! lalalalala song! The unexpected Brewers slugger broke out of his slump and hit a monster home run at Citi Field off Jacob deGrom. Keon Broxton also hit a home run, and deGrom got lit up something fierce. Oh, and Michael Conforto hit an RBI double. #FreeConforto!

Tigers 6, Royals 5

Rockies 0, Mariners 5 – Even despite two errors, this was all Seattle. Good start from James Paxton. 

Nationals 3, Giants 1 – Mad Max Scherzer fanned eleven. If they keep playing this way then Royce Harpler’s three game suspension is merely just a rest for the upcoming summer grind.

Diamondbacks 6, Pirates 5 F/14

Yankees 4, Orioles 10 – The Orioles came to play! Adam Jones and Chris Davis both hit multi-run homers and my future boyfriend Mark Trumbo added to the RBI tally with a two run double of his own. Kevin Gausman was flirting with disaster, but he got out of a jam time and again.

Red Sox 4, White Sox 1 – The Laundry Battles wages on. The Panda came through with a good day at the plate and Boston made the best out of a quality start from Drew Pomeranz. A bad day for Big Pelf…I mean, Mike Pelfrey. The poor guy can’t win for losing. He was doing really well! But then Chicago’s bullpen happened.

Dodgers 1, Cardinals 2 – Oh, hey, Dexter Fowler! He hit a home run to edge St. Louis over the Dodgers and split the series.

Reds 4, Blue Jays 5

A’s 3, Indians 1

16 thoughts on “He Said, She Said – Recaps for 5/31/17

  1. It seems, unknown to the rest of the league, Houston and Minnesota were playing football, not baseball.

    I will start by saying< “Wow, I love this!” so people don’t think I’m greedy and whining. But Astros starters are still not eating the innings like they need to. Too many 4-5 inning efforts. That will matter in the long run, especially as the playoffs approach. I still see that trade for another arm as almost a certainty.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Would you be interested in our backup catcher Gimenez? Only giving up two runs in the ninth he was one of our more effective pitchers yesterday and he pitched a scoreless inning in his previous appearance this year. His fastball touches the low 80’s.


      1. There seems to be general agreement that Kyle Tucker is the primary trade chip. I think Martes looks to be on the bubble, too, although so far AAA has been a bit of a problem for him.

        Depending on whom you trade to, I have heard that there is some interest in Gattis.

        Other than that I don’t know for sure. I know the White Sox wanted a bunch of minor leaguers plus Bregman for Quintana.. That didn’t fly at the time.

        I have no idea if they might try to sell high on Marwin Gonzalez, either.


      2. Oops, I didn’t answer your question. The conversation has been Archer/Quintana-type pitchers with some controllable time left. Proven, but still someone not too expensive.

        Barring injuries, I think a solid #3 pitcher might be enough to change their fortunes. I’m not sure who that would be. Don’t have a name on that one.

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Am I crazy for preferring a guy like Sonny Gray over Jose Quintana? I know Gray is an injury risk, but I also see him as a Tim Hudson type, which to me is a risk I would rather take.


        2. No, not crazy at all. I think I saw Gray’s name mentioned, too.

          Face it, every front line pitcher is an injury risk.

          Liked by 1 person

  2. While you off-the-corner types are revelling in inexcusable violence, I will merely note that the Feesh behind Dan the Man Straily swapt the Feelies for their fourth straight win last night behind the slugging of Marcell the Damned and a pair of bombs from the Wild Bour, who now is second in the league in gophers with 15. Mind you, the Sons of Coatlicue are slithering into town today and throwing a real pitcher, Weird Zack “Wash your Hands!” Greinke, at us tonight so we’ll see what Jeff Locke looks like at last when taken down orf the shelf and thrown into combat against a real team.

    Unfortunately, whereas the Feesh do have a “Bark at the Park!” day when you can bring your dog to a game, they do not, alas, have a “Buzzzzz at the Park!” day when you can bring your pet rattlesnake. Sadly, I cannot augment the closer to 1,300 fans who attended yesterday’s Feelie bashing party with my little serpentine pal Friendo. Incidentally, here’s a pretty good shot of what Friendo looks like:

    Now then. Jeb!’s abdication probably crestfelled those Feesh fans who were chumming at the gunwales for Scrooge to cede his ownership to someone, anyone, else. Instead they got the bad news like Bruce popping up in Sheriff Brody’s face. But never fear: word is that BeepBeep is out there beating the bushes for some new investors or even contemplating the jump to the Tagg Romney group to close out the sale.

    Meanwhile, word just broke in the Macondo Feeshwrapper that Scrooge McLoria has diverted the $700,000 MLB compensatory life insurance payment for El Keed to a trust fund for his newborn daughter Penelope and Jose’s mother. One hopes we can soon say of Scrooge, as we did of the Thane of Cawder, that nothing in his ownership so became him as the leaving of it.

    And Prof, I sent Bour a message to wear his tight spandex undies tonight so you can get a better look at his tushy. Don’t say I never did nuthin’ for ya.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I am of two minds about guys. I either like them thick as gravy or skinny as a rail. The super ripped types are generally a meh for me, as are the unusually beautiful. I mean, yeah they are pretty, but I am a sucker for the quirky. The smart ones usually do it for me, although in Trumbo’s case that’s purely physical. The guy is a 10/10 in the aesthetics dept.


    2. Also, If ZG is back to his head gamesy self, he’s gonna carve your Feesh like a back alley butcher.

      What’s going on with Christian Yelich? Did he forget to eat his Wheaties? Is Bour eating them instead?


  3. Scherzer almost had a Maddux last night. Complete game, 100 pitches exactly, one run surrendered; so much fun watching him pitch when he’s on like that.

    Harper needed the time off. I mentioned yesterday that he’d been mortal the last month, but he’s been positively awful his last twelve games:


    No word on if he’s spending any of his off days in Palo Alto:

    The schedule makers did the Nats a solid on this trip. Three in San Francisco, followed by a night off tonight before three in Oakland over the weekend, and word is the team went and got themselves one of those executive suites for tonight’s NBA finals Game 1. We’ll see how many guys miss Friday’s game with flu-like symptoms.

    The one concern about Harper’s suspension is that the Nats only have three natural OFs on their active roster right now – Werth, Taylor, and Goodwin. Dusty wants to DH Werth during one of the upcoming games in Oakland, which might mean Adam Lind gets to do his Greg Luzinski impersonation in LF. He played out there this past Sunday, and didn’t do any damage, so I guess he deserves one more shot.

    Liked by 1 person

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