Derek Jeter Is Off The Market!

ATTENTION HUMANS OF NEW YORK AND MLB FANS EVERYWHERE!

This:

can no longer be yours.  Oops, I meant this:

derek_jeter_thr_shoot_p_1_15

Yes, the Jetes has married. He is off the market, folks, and eager to move into fatherhood, he says. Expect the NY tabloids to already be ramping up coverage of the pending appearance of little 2xx, 2xy, and/or 2xyy, 2xxyy, etc.

For those savoring the present moment, the wedding was held in California and attended by 100 of the couple’s closest friends and family. As always, Jorge Posada and Tino Martinez were on the Captain’s infield. Get used to that, wifey. You’ve married into Yankee royalty, so you might as well get cool with Pettitte serving as godfather and A-Rod babysitting. No word on whether the Captain called in The Closer for the ceremony.

Congratulations to Mr. Hannah Davis on his most excellent coupling and to the bride on scoring those lifetime tickets!

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3 thoughts on “Derek Jeter Is Off The Market!

  1. You know, that’s a really weird pose in that picture – is Jetes hard of hearing? Scratching his neck with his thumb? But, at least he seem happy about whatever the heck he’s doing there…Also, B/W? Historio’, you picked a really intriguing photo to post…

    Like

    • It cracks me up because it looks like they photoshopped out his phone and left hime looking like a deaf old man…which would be some super-stealth shade.

      Like

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