Excuse the language, but what the holy fuck are they thinking in Texas? Not content to let the Braves and Washington Racists Football Team be the laughing stock in stadium demands, the Texas Rangers have decided to jump in on the action. As reported by the Dallas News, the Rangers are about to unveil plans for a new stadium. Because their stadium which was just legally allowed to drink last fucking year is too old.
According to two major league sources, the Rangers and City of Arlington are about to announce plans for a new retractable-roof stadium that is expected to come on line earlier than the current lease expires following the 2023 season. An announcement could come as soon as Friday.
It is uncertain how far ahead of the 2024 season the new stadium could be opened — or how it would be financed — but getting into a new retractable-roof stadium ahead of time is likely to significantly increase the value of the club and add multiple years of new revenue streams.
Yes, the Rangers current stadium is just 22 years old (It was opened in 1994), and already the Rangers want to move out and to do so before the lease runs out in 7 years. What are they going to do with the old stadium? Who gives a shit, it’s not like the Rangers paid for it. Stupid fucking taxpayers. Enjoy this multi-million structure that has basically zero practical use. Now cough up some dough for another one we can abandon faster than I can birth a kid and put them through college.
The Star-Telegram reported that a new $900 million ballpark be split equally between the city and the Rangers. WFAA-TV (Channel 8) reported that an election would be held in November to dedicate Arlington’s half-cent sales tax currently paying off the Cowboys AT&T Stadium to the new Rangers ballpark.
But what about Texas Live! you ask? Again, not the Ranger’s problem. That shit’s saddled on the local tax payers. What is Texas Live!? Dude, get with the times okay? Texas Live! (Yes, the exclamation mark is part of the stupid fucking name.) is a $200 million dollar development right next to the soon to be abandoned stadium featuring a 100,000 foot entertainment complex including hotels, restaurants, shopping centers, etc. It’s a follow up project to multiple similar projects that have already failed. The city was funding half of that project.
What’s the motivation for the new stadium from the cities perspective? To keep the Rangers from leaving for a new city like fucking Dallas, a whopping 37 minute drive. That’s gotta be worth at least 2 billion dollars right there. So that’s a downright steal!
The other motivation for the new stadium? It gets really hot in Texas so they want a retractable roof. Because no one fucking realized that it gets hot in Texas 20 years ago.
Where are they going to build the stadium? Who knows! How much is it going to cost? Not my problem, stupid tax payers will pay for it! But we are going to go ahead and announce that this is happening, and it will, because people are fucking stupid, and will do anything to make sure they keep Billionare owners of the 8th riches baseball team supplied with new expensive toys. Expect more and more teams to jump on the insane “I need a new stadium or I’m walking” demands as Atlanta and Texas are proving, people will continue to pay for this sort of privileged bullshit.
Updated information from MLBTR:
Further details of the ballpark plans have emerged, with MLB.com’s T.R. Sullivan (all links to Twitter) and Jeff Wilson of the Fort Worth Star-Telegram (Twitter link) were among those to report. The plans call for a $1B facility that would be ready for play by at least 2021, with a lease running through 2054. Team and city plan to split that fee equally, with an “extension” of a current tax used for the public funding. In terms of politics, city council approval will be sought on May 24th, with a public election on November 8th also needed to finalize the deal.
1 Billion Dollars to be used to build a replacement for a stadium that is several decades away from needing to be replaced. It’s a good thing we have other problems like poverty, disease, illiteracy, crime, and terrible academic scores all fixed.