We are a bunch of nerds here, I have noticed. I have keen observation skills. For my next trick, I will observe that the sky is blue and that water is wet. I am betting that we all share a love for this curly haired creative lunatic genius:
Nationals 3-Tigers 2. Max Scherzer operated like a surgeon on his old team, the Detroit Tigers. He mowed them down. There are 27 outs. Twenty of these outs came by K. 119 pitches, 96 were strikes, 0 walks. He had a really good night.
(Or my cat was prancing on my keyboard. If you ever see a comment like this: fhwkfkwff08///cls0d2. I did not have a mental breakdown. That was Crush saying hello.)
I highly encourage you to click this entertaining link:
Padres 7-Cubs 4. Padres 1 – Cubs 0. Okay, so about this. Yesterday, I posted how historically awesome the Cubs have been. I am not the only person on the internet to note how awesome the Cubs have been. Yet somehow, this is MY fault (@longfootlefty). The Cubs are now experiencing their longest skid of the season: TWO GAMES. Oh noooooooooo. I checked Baseball Prospectus and their post-season odds have gone from 99% to 10%. You blew it, guys. You could have gone all the way, but you lost two games in a row to the Padres, dropping you down to 25-8 for a winning percentage of .758. I don’t even know how this team can look at itself in the mirror tomorrow. A two game skid. Jesus, smdh.
Mariners 6-Rays 5. The Rays were swept in three games by Seattle. They’re not very good. I’m talking about both teams. The Rays were down at one point, 4-0. Archer crapped again. I thought the game was done. Dickerson hit a grand slam. 4-4. Mariners pulled ahead. 5-4. Kiermaier hits a homer in the 9th. 5-5. Feelin’ groovy. Extras. Mariners walk-off. Chris Ianetta hits a bomb in the 11th of Steve Geltz. This one hurt.
O’s 9-Twins 2. It occurred to me tonight that if the Mets are Team Captain America (David Wright), why the Orioles must be Team Iron Man (Cal Ripken Jr.)! Yes, I told you, I am a goddamned nerd. We don’t all look the same. Some of us are cute. 🙂
I actually preferred this 100: 1 to the original, and the original is fantastic too. You see me roll on my Segway, look at me, I’m white & nerdy. How’d I’d get so white & nerdy?…Only question I ever thought was hard, was do I like Kirk or do I like Picard?
The Orioles did what they do best. Blast beaucoup bombs–5 total?
Red Sox 13-A’s 3. JBJ hit 2 homers and has a 17 game hitting streak. Not too shabby. Our brother team from the other bay had a bad not so bueno series also. They limp into Tampa Bay for a weekend series. I will go see them on Saturday. Both teams can’t lose but I am sure both will try their hardest. They commit crimes against baseball.
Giants 5-Blue Jays 4 (13). Another tough loss. The Jays battled back to force extras only to lose by walking Buster Posey with the bases loaded, oh god.
I want to hear again how the Cubs had a bad day! Tell me a story…
Well maple syrup and snow’s what they export
They treat curling just like it’s a real sport
They think their silly accent is so cute
Can’t understand a thing they’re talkin’ aboot
Sure they got their national health care
Cheaper meds, low crime rates and clean air
Then again well they got Celine Dion
Eat their weight in Kraft macaroni
And dream of drivin’ a Zamboni
All over Saskatchewan 😉
Braves 5-Phillies 1. The Braves won a game. This is big news. Okay, seriously. Williams Perez pitched a 2 hitter into the 8th and actually had a perfect game into the 5th. He was recalled after Chacin was traded to the Angels. Freeman hit a homer for the Braves, continuing to be their primary (sole) source for offense.
Rangers 6 -White Sox 5. The Rangers take the series. Frazier is hurt after diving in the stands to retrieve a ball. He made the catch.
He hit his mouth on the seat and is listed as day-to-day.
Astros 5 – Cleveland 3.(16) Wow, 16 innings. Marwin Gonzalez hits a 2 run walk-off homer.
Royals 7-Yankees 3. Ventura silences Yankees bats. I hope they use foil.
Rockies 8-D’backs 7. Arenado goes 3 for 4.
Pirates 5- Reds 4. The Bucs go boom, first 4 hits were homers.
Cardinals 5 – Angels 2. We should take this game as evidence of the National League’s superiority. (I hope this sarcasm font is working). Apparently, this young 2016 season should be seen as evidence that all those years of the AL beating up on the NL in interleague play was just an illusion.
No evidence here AT ALL that the American League line-up might have a slight advantage. Nothing to see here. Move along.
You’re still here? Okay… shika shika. Dum bom bom.
Go home. Go on now.
Ducks are assholes.
What the hell is this song about anyway? I still like it. Apparently, Cobain smells like a brand of antiperspirant for teenage girls. Uh, smelled. He probably doesn’t smell good now.
As a kid, this one was a particular favorite. “Oh, Lucy, I’m home!”
You were not planning on working today, were you?