So, What Did I Miss? (5/3/16)

Short, sweet, and sassy, just like… Jose Altuve.

I have the kids this week so these have to be compact.

Cubs 7-Pirates 2. Lots of gamesmenship in this one. Salty, chippy match-up. Yuummmy, salty chips. Both benches warned. Rizzo and his grandpa both had big hits, so adorbs.

Rangers 2-Blue Jays 1. Another post season rematch. Nomar Mazara hit the go-ahead HR in the 8th.

Mets 4-Braves 1. Bartolo Colon with his 220th win.

Giants 9-Reds 6. Finnegan pitched well, bullpen messed it up for him as Giants come from behind. Cueto’s homecoming.

Brewers 8 – Angels 5. Braun went 3 for 3, Trout 4 for 5.

Twins 6-Astros 2. Keuchel’s first loss in Houston since 2014.

Cardinals 10-Phillies 3. Phillies 6 game win streak over. Waino dominant.

Nationals 2-Royals 0. Gio did not Gio. Who is a good Gio? Who is? You are!

Mariners 4 – A’s 3. Cano and Nelson Cruz, 3 for 4.

Padres 2-Rockies 1. Trevor Story didn’t hit a homer. Nolan Arenado didn’t either? My universe is destroyed.

Fill it in everybody. These are them bare bones.

Get on the mike, just get on the mike, get on the mike, Mike!


32 thoughts on “So, What Did I Miss? (5/3/16)

  1. The Nats have so far gone 4-0 on their Terrible Horrible No Good Very Bad Road Trip, which is a damn sight better than I’d hoped for. It’s a good thing, too, because those pesky Mets just refuse to lose, and so the Nats maintain a slim lead at this point, which is really only meaningful in that they’re not losing touch with the Mets.

    Harper’s now mired in a 1-18 slump, and seems a bit impatient at the plate, chasing pitches he’d have spit on last year, as teams give him fewer and fewer pitches to hit; hopefully he’ll get it figured out, but in the meantime, the Nats offense is doing enough to win right now.

    As for “Gio didn’t Gio” (which I’m gonna trademark), here’s an actual quote from today’s game story:

    “Gonzalez’s improved demeanor has been an underlying theme of his strong start to the season. With some help from Washington Nationals director of mental conditioning Mark Campbell, the normally emotional Gonzalez has adopted new breathing techniques.”

    Can’t wait for this to happen later this season:

    Gio also had some words regarding The Big Marine:

    “It’s crazy how it is when the manager lets you pitch more than three innings,” said Gonzalez, implying former manager Matt Williams didn’t trust him. “It’s unbelievable when your manager believes in you so much. I’m happy to see that [Baker] has all the confidence in the world to let me pitch. I’ve been doing this for quite a while. I’m just grateful he believes in me in every inning and lets me go out there and become the pitcher I am.”

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Wainwright was far from dominant, I should know he’s on my FB team. He was adequate, only 4Ks and allowed 5 hits, a walk and three earned runs. Against a team so lacking in offense only the Braves are worse. Adam has yet to start a game and allow less than three runs and pitch beyond the sixth.

    On the other hand his hitting has been quite good, too bad I don’t get points for those.


  3. My Red Sox Input? The fat fuck is done for the season! Yay😊 He needs surgery on his arm, we clear a roster spot and the insurance pays a good portion of his horrible contract this year. I’m off to work or otherwise I’ll just write a wall of text just to celebrate.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Are you sure about the insurance?

      For those asking: When a contract is not insured, a team cannot recoup any money. That is the case with #RedSox and Sandoval.— Ken Rosenthal (@Ken_Rosenthal) May 3, 2016


        • Are you telling me that they gave 95 million dollars to a guy with weight loss issues and they DIDN’T HAVE ANY FUCKING INSURANCE? Enjoy your shadenfreud, I deserve it. This, this….is what happens when you punch a stranger in the Alps! Fool you fooling Donny, you’re out of your fluffy league!

          Yeah I’m an antenna guy now, sometimes what they try to hide is funnier than the fucking filth that lost all shock value 35 years ago.

          Tl;Dr , I am now seriously pissed off about the Panda.😤


        • Honestly, I wouldn’t be shocked if they couldn’t get him underwritten. I’m not sure how it is in baseball, but I do know the NBA’s underwriter is allowed to refuse to underwrite a small handful of contracts each year. It was one of the reasons everybody laughed at that deal the Knicks gave Amar’e and his ticking time bomb knees – they were on the hook no matter when they gave out.


  4. I only managed to catch the last couple of innings of the Jays – Rangers game. Texas seems to have a budding superstar in the person of Nomar Mazara. The kid — yes, he’s truly a kid… he just turned 21 a week ago, and has replaced Roberto Osuna as the youngest player in the majors — hit the go-ahead homer in the top of the 8th then uncorked a perfect throw to nail Saunders (the would-be tying run) at the plate in the bottom of the same inning. Biggeth Dicketh pitched well, but the Jays’ anemic bats come up empty again.

    Best crowd anticipation moment: In the 8th, Jose Bautista came to bat against Sam Dyson with two men on base…. a repeat of the situation that lad to the “bat flip” home run in Game 5 of the ALDS. This time Dyson prevailed, as Bautista flied out to Mazara, and Saunders — AGAIN — failed to tag up and advance.

    I can’t embed the video, even from YouTube, but here is Mazara’s home run and throw home.


  5. And Astros fans learn the lesson of Existentialism once again. There is no reason in the universe, the kids can’t hit, and Keuchel is beatable in Houston.

    Even I, connoisseur of the absurd for my many years, did not expect this disastrous start. It was clear that Luhnow was overconfident, not addressing catcher, third base or the back two pitchers in the order. The Ken Giles deal in retrospect looks like the move of a supremely overconfident GM, sure that he can overpay for the one piece he needs.


    It was not hard for a pessimist to look through all the hype and see a team that might be geared to only about 81 wins. I thought they would be better, but .500 seemed like a reasonable floor. But, for the moment, that would be a worthy goal and maybe overly optimistic.


  6. O’s had the day off to mourn the loss of J.J.Hardy. Good thing they did, we had a hell of a storm right around when the 7th inning would have hit, so the game would have certainly been washed out anyways. Going to rain all fucking week. so that means a double dose of shitty traffic followed by possibly no baseball. Work is going to be nutty this week with all day meetings every day as we roll out a major accounting system update, so my posting may be sparse to say the least. I already hate this week.


  7. The Feesh were migrating last night so I watched my favorite one man team, Bartolo the Round, shut out the Barves for the eight innings he spent on the mound. Unfortunately, it was a workmanly performance, appropriate for an old master facing a gaggle of rabble (which the Supreme Court would call a “well disciplined militia”). No behind-the-back putouts at first base (still among my alltime favorite hi-lite snippets in baseball). But it was still Bartolo, the Sta-Puft Marshmallow Man of the Mound, who, at times, keeps reminding me of (blast from the past!) Fernando Valenzuela. How can you not love him?

    My guess is that the Barf front orifice has the Widow of St. Pierre they borrowed from Scrooge McLoria set up in the press room of their doomed stadium awaiting the team’s return from the road before they drop the mouton on their hapless and equally doomed manager, Fat Fredi. Nice symmetry there. I was wondering what was taking them so long to get it over with, when it occurred to me that Scrooge probably didn’t want to spend the money cleaning it and after ten summary executions in 13 years you have to figure it needed more than a small bag of Simple Green.

    “Show them my head. It will be worth it.”


  8. Khris Davis hit the ball far for the A’s. too bad there were 2 line into double plays a head of him.

    pitchers left in too long, players playing out of position. mariners running into outs.

    sigh, seems like the A’s are having a bad year


  9. The Cubs haven’t lost more than 1 game in a row so far this season. I don’t expect that to hold up all year. I’m not even really sure of an easy way to look such a thing up, but I’m kinda curious as to what the record is for most games into a season without losing consecutive games.

    And while their record is 18-6, their Pythagorean record is 20-4, so it could be argued that they’ve been a tiny bit unlucky.

    On the mound against the Pirates tonight, Jake Bearietta….


  10. Jose Altuve has 12 doubles, seven homers, he’s 9-1 on stolen base attempts and it looks like he’s gone ahead and doubled his walk rate for good measure. He’s starting to remind me of another second baseman who came up in Houston and I wonder when Jose’s name will start coming up when we talk about the best player in baseball.


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