I was planning to do a brief recap tonight. No music. My favorite musician has died. The day the music died. Bye… bye.
Then I thought better of it. No. I was wrong. Professor is right. The music lives. It has not died. It lives. It will always live. This pain–it is good and beautiful. It’s healthy. It reminds us we’re alive and that we love. And what better therapy is there than baseball, my old friend?
Wipe those tears, child. There is so much to celebrate from last night.
Jake Arietta threw another no-hitter as his team utterly demolished the Reds, 16 – 0. I mean, yeah. Wow. It was incredible to watch. I don’t know about you, but I feel privileged. I was overjoyed with every pitch. He has become Must Watch TV. Before, my list was Clayton Kershaw, Jose Fernandez, David Price, uh… welcome to the club, Jake. Long, long overdue, my apologies, good sir. Here’s your leather chair with your name on it. Would you like a cigar? Ohhhh, of course, you don’t smoke, Mr. Health Fanatic. Just hold it, it looks good on you. Anything looks good on you, really, but I digress. I’ll get you that protein shake right away…
Prior to the game, Arietta sent out this Tweet:
What better way to celebrate brilliance than more brilliance–pitching a no-hitter? Well done, Mr. Arietta. And no, thank you, Jake. Thank you for making yesterday bearable. More than bearable. Joyful. I could watch the GIF loop all night. He will rock you as will his team.
@professormaddog31 already mentioned this in her delicious snack, but I have to repeat it because Twitter love. The Dodgers have invited the Reds to their Jake Arietta No Hitter Support Group.
H/t Dodgers. I laughed so hard. I may attend it too. My team gets no-hit at least once a year so I have experience dealing with these situations. The 5 stages of “Oh Shit, My Loser Team Has No Damn Hits” Grief: Anger, Depression, Negotiation, Denial, Acceptance. Acceptance is a good place to be. You respect the history being made, and remember, it just counts as a loss. No style points in baseball, and you move on. See, I am an expert. It’s really the least I can do.
One of the things I love about Twitter are the team accounts, and how they interact playfully with each other. If you’re a person who is into fun, you would enjoy that aspect of Twitter. Yes, there is negative stuff on Twitter. There are positives and negatives to practically everything. If you only focus on the negative, I’m sorry but it’s not my problem. Here is another 80s icon to express my feelings on that subject.
Did I say something wrong? Ooops, I didn’t know I couldn’t speak my mind…And I’m not sorry. It’s human nature. I’m not your bitch; don’t hang your shit on me.
The other thing that made the no-hitter super special? Grandpa Rossy got to catch it. He is retiring after this season. He is not getting some grand retirement tour like some pompous asshole. He’s just gonna ride off into the sunset with this fantastic memory, and I have a feeling there are going to be some more great memories for this team this season. I don’t know, something about some stupidly ridiculous positive run differential. +60. Jesus Christ. Can we borrow some?
Okay, I’m almost done… here are some Cliff Clavin facts about the no-hitter:
- No team since the 1938 Yankees had posted a margin of victory greater than 11 runs in a no-hitter.
- Since June 21st of last year, Arrieta owns a 0.86 ERA, a 0.70 WHIP, has struck out 173, and walked 33. This is over 24 regular-season starts and 178 innings. Opponents are batting .150 against him. These are silly, silly numbers. Each of those 24 starts has been a QS.
- The streak of 24 QS is the longest in the majors. It is a Cubs franchise record and it is the longest since Bob Gibson in ’67-68 with 26. When you are being mentioned in the same air as Bob Gibson, you are indeed in good company.
- Arrieta has 15 wins since his last loss, on July 25, 2015, against the Phillies. Rick Sutcliffe owns the currents Cubs record, 16, 1984-85. I recall 1984 also being a good year for the Cubs.
- This is the 15th no hitter in Cubs history. He is the third to throw more than one: Larry Corcoran, had three in the 1880s, and Ken Holtzman, 1969 and 1971. Oh, but wait, there’s more! I’ll throw in this sham-wow if you act now!
- “Arrieta is the fourth Cy Young Award winner to throw a no-hitter in the following season, according to ESPN. Clayton Kershaw did it in 2014, Gibson in 1971 and Koufax in ’64. Of the previous three, only Kershaw repeated as the Cy Young winner.”
- The Reds were last no hit in 1971. Half of us here weren’t even born yet.
This is one of those special baseball nights. Where were you when Jake pitched that 16 – 0 no-hitter? If you weren’t watching this, I don’t know about you. The offense was just stupid–y’all can cover that below.
So speaking of pompous assholes, Boston and David Ortiz were defeated handily by my upstart punks, the Rays, yesterday afternoon, 12 – 8. David Price, former Tampa Bay Ray, our first round pick–hey, baby, wassup, honey? How’s it going in Boston? They treating you good there? Has Shaughnessy torn you a new one yet? There are some Rude Boys up there in Boston. I would have stayed in Toronto.
At least you have that paycheck to comfort you. But I know you, David. The money isn’t enough. You want to be the best. You were bested yesterday by a team with a negative run differential (which has improved greatly, trending in the right direction). A team that probably makes less collectively than you make in a single year? Hahahahaha… nothing personal, I love David Price except for when he’s being a sexist anti-nerdist. But that comeback yesterday… oh, it was just what I needed.
I don’t mind you coming here, and wasting all my time. Wanna watch some baseball? 🙂
The Rays were down early, 5 – 1. Normally, you can sound the death knell. Bring out your dead. “But I’m not dead yet.” Ah, you will be soon. The Rays are done normally when they are down by 4 runs. But nope. These Rays have a little fight in them.They chased Price out of the game with a 6 run fourth inning. Thank you, my boys, for also giving me a reason to smile and cheer ecstatically. The Rays take the series in Boston, 2 of 3. Maybe PECOTA sorta knows something. Stupid PECOTA. 😉 Souza, specially, has been playing inspired baseball since the foul ball incident last Friday. I know–narratives, but he’s the kind of player who would be inspired to perform by something like that. He’s a special kind of guy. I don’t mean “special”, like he needs extra help with his homework special. He’s just a nice person. Last year, Souza doesn’t make this catch. He is not known for his defense.
Another thing that made me very happy. Oakland, dafuq you did in the Bronx? You broke out that broom, didn’t ya? It did look like it needed some cleaning. You drop kicked the Yankees into last place and in the process helped my Rays climb out of the cellar (they’ve been playing well–they earned it too). Now I’m just getting downright goofy. This song would have been better if a pitcher named Sonny had been on the hill, but my Rays are the sun, right? Rich Hill got the W, striking out 10 in the process of beating the Yanks 7 – 3.
Again, I’m reading MLB.com’s recap and smiling. The A’s hit 4 bombs versus the Borg: Canha, Coghlan, the other Khris Davis, and delicious breakfast cereal Coco Crisp all hit one. Very cool, brothers on the other bay. Thanks for weakening the Borg. We’ll try to finish them off this weekend.
Oh, momma dear, we’re not the fortunate ones, and girls, they wanna have fun.
We may not be the fortunate teams, Oakland and Tampa Bay, but we know how to stretch a dollar. Living on the dole in ugly stadiums. It’s so much fun to beat the rich ones, isn’t it? How freaking cute was Cyndi Lauper though? What a great song.
Minnesota was purply last night.
The one and only time I saw aurora borealis I was in Alaska, and they were purple dancing lights. They sort of looked like this:
So beautiful, mystical, and magical. I still get goosebumps at the memory. And that’s how I want to imagine Minnesota last night, awash in purple dancing northern lights. The Twins defeated the Brewers 8 – 1 on the strength of Eddie Rosario’s 4 hits, and Ricky Nolasco’s strong pitching performance.
Like a bird without her song.
I’m gonna finish listening to this elegant, heartbreaking song and get ready for work. Please finish the recap for me. You know the routine. Write a recap and a link to a song that fit the mood. Thanks, guys and gals. I do this because I love the conversation and interaction that you bring.
So, what did I miss? A lot, I know. It was a roller coaster day with the highest high and the lowest low.