Fan Interference

Promises, promises. Jason Heyward made you none, Best Fans in Baseball.

St. Louis acted like a jilted lover. Here ya go.

We’ll start with what I consider the marquee match-up, with all apologies to Patriot Day in Boston. Jason Heyward returning to St. Louis and the current best rivalry in baseball, Cubs vs. Cardinals, was the best show in town yesterday.

Yesterday, The Best Fans in Baseball greeted Prodigal Son, Jason Heyward (who was there one whole season), with a chorus of hearty boos. But I am not here to chastise you, Best Fans, for booing. Good for you, getting in touch with your dark side. We all have one. You are only human. Of flesh and blood you are made. Born to make mistakes.

Booooooo, like a Yankees fan. Boooooo, like a Red Sox fan. Boo with gusto to your heart’s content. However, please, for the good of all that is holy, stop calling yourselves that Best Fans crap. And don’t give me that y’all don’t call yourselves the Best Fans and it’s a “media creation.” There is a significant segment that totally buys that bull excrement with your passive aggressive pseudo-politeness. I jokingly tease people I meet from St. Louis about being the “Best Fans.” With no irony, dead serious: “We’d like to think so.” Hahaha, sooo cute. Such lies. You are just like everybody else. Flawed. I wanted to find a video of Heyward saluting the crowd when he was booed, indeed a very classy response, but instead, you’ll just have to settle for this defensive gem, in which he covered 91 feet and reached a max velocity of 20.4 mph to catch Wong’s shoulda-been-hit:

The Cubs take the first game in dominant fashion, 5 – 0. 

And don’t look now (seriously, don’t look, because his face might freeze you like Medusa), but John Lackey recorded the W, and has become the 16th pitcher to defeat every team in baseball. John Lackey is very high in tWtW. And overgrown nose hair. Lackey struck out 11, and even helped out with the offense, singling in a run. Leake also looked dominant initially, but ran out of gas during a treacherous 7th inning when he gave up four runs.

Over to Boston, where we know this much is true.

The bullpens for both teams were shaky and the Blue Jays nearly gave me a heart-attack in the 9th inning, but the Jays held on to win 4 – 3. Holy crap, Storen, do not pull that bullshit against the Red Sox. It’s Patriot Day, we don’t want Boston happy! Okay, in all seriousness, the day began honoring the Boston Marathon victims–a horrifically heartbreaking day for the city and the country. Boston bombing victim Jeff Bauman and Jake Gyllenhaal threw out the first pitches simultaneously:

And Jackie Bradley Jr. made such a great catch on a Tulo almost double. I mean, I hate the Red Sox, but h/t, man. 97% route efficiency.

That was beautiful. Buccholz was very happy. Canadian Russell Martin with a 2 run single. Has anyone checked his paperwork? Make sure he is here legally?

Sorry, Philly. It is over. The fat lady sang. The Son of Odin wuz here and you lost, 5 – 2. Thor’s buddy, Captain America, hit 2 home runs in support of his teammate, because that is what Avengers do. I wonder who’s Bucky on the Mets. That would be my interview question for them. Who is the Winter Soldier? He would have to be pretty bad-ass. (I honestly cannot remember if @professormaddog31 asked this question already, and if she didn’t, this is a question she would ask. I don’t know a bigger fan of the Winter Soldier.) And who secretly (or not so secretly) dresses up as Black Widow? Daniel Murphy is gone–you can let your freak flag fly now. Anyhow… back to Thor. Syndergaard pitched 7 innings, allowed one run, five hits, struck out eight, and walked two. The Phils’ Eickhoff almost matched him: 7 IP/2 ER/5 H/9K/3BB, but the bullpen let him down.

My “Story-book Romance” continues with a certain Colorado Rockie.

Oh, that 80s hair. So much Aqua Net. Ozone layer, wherefore art thou?

I keep questioning if Trevor Story is the real deal and if I am right to feel these feelings–I have been let down before by these type of players. Remember Sam Fuld in 2011? “Superman wears a Sam Fuld t-shirt to bed.” Yeah. I’ve been burnt. Are you for real, Mr. Story? My heart says yes. Yesterday, you did this:

“Continues to lead all of baseball with his 8 home runs.”

Now I was called out because I have said that I am not a long ball fan–this chick does not dig the long ball. Fair enough. Well, it’s not that I don’t like home runs. I understand the basic concept of baseball–outscore your opponent and a home run is an extremely efficient manner of accomplishing that goal. So yes, yay, home run! The display of power is simply not as thrilling as a pitchers’ duel, that’s all. What I find impressive is that Story is doing something that hasn’t been done before. It just happens to be with home runs. He could be stealing 3 bases every game instead; I would be just as impressed. He keeps this up, we’re looking at our National League Rookie of the Year.

Oh yeah, the game. The Rockies won 5 – 1.

Miami beats the Nationals, 6 – 1, saving us from Old Gator’s lamentations for one day. Perhaps. Ah, who are we kidding? 🙂  I will keep this one short because he will do a great job summarizing his team. The song that comes to mind–what has Miami done to deserve Jeff Loria? What have they, what have they, what have they done to deserve him?

Jose Fernandez was wild, but he still found a way to stave off the hot Washington Harpers. Harper scored his team’s only run on a sac fly. The Iron Giant broke out of his slump.

The  Angels demolished the White Sox, 7 – 0, but I can’t go for that.

Trout only went 1 for 4 in all of that. Help momma out, Trout! Hector Santiago was a beast though: 7 IP/2 H/0 ER/10 K/3 BB. Rodon pitched 0.1 innings and.. wow. He had a bad day.

Minnesota with the W in a rain shortened game, 7 – 4, over the Brewers. Check them out, winning and twining, and I don’t even know what that means. Just go with it. They only needed 6 innings to pound out 14 hits which included home runs by Sano and Byung Ho Park. You get your native son, Prince, singing Purple Rain. One it rained, and two, you made it rain–hits that is.

The late game on stupid time. Arizona and the Giants. I was actually watching because apparently, I do plan to sleep when I am dead, and because I watched the Giants blow the lead sending the game into extras which means now I am invested, which makes no sense, I know. I am not even a fan of either of these two teams. The D’backs were indeed rich with grit tonight, as they completed their comeback in 11 innings, 9 – 7. Jake Lamb hit a game tying homer in the 9th, which I saw, with 2 outs, and then added an RBI double. If I were the Giants, I’d serve some lamb shish kebobs in the clubhouse today. That’ll show him.

It just cleared Levi’s Landing.

I am going to sleep a little bit before going to work. Please…

I don’t want to oversleep. My new apartment is only 5 minutes from work, so I can sleep more.

So, what did I miss?